13.12.08

Forgiveness

(diler yağız):
"Commit suicide! It’s that easy. No one will get hurt anymore. No one… Not even you…” she said herself.

She took the last match from the matchbox.
She smoked her last cigarette.

She couldn’t taste it.
With every puff, she faded slowly.
She was shivering.

She just wanted to hear a word.
Maybe a word that states the hate…
Just a word…

She could give everything…
Not to lose him…
To have him…
To be loved…
To be forgiven…

She didn’t mean to hurt him.
She was begging him to stay.
In vain…

She couldn’t live without him.
So she had decided to give her life.
Her heart…
Maybe this could mean something to him.

At last she asked herself:
"Why?
Why did you do?
Why did you say?
Why should this all happen?"

And then she died.
Words echoed in the air, even after she died:
“Forgive me!”

She left just a heart with the love to him.

She was dead.
But she loved him.
She always did...
--------
Serj:
I hear her cries... screams of torment heard by none
I watch her die... signs of death are all around...
Everything we dared to hope is lost and so are we
Don't you see that all we had is lost in this search for more?
I stare into a mirror of shame and shattered pride
Feeling the heart of man drain itself of blood
Smash the mirror and try to see the other side
But all that I find is the wall we stand behind
I hear her cries... signs of death are all around...
All the years we never cared resound and leave her numb
Ain't no way for her to hide and flee her dying fate
If I could change you, if I could heal your bleeding wounds I should...

But words are not enough
Wake up and face tomorrow now before we find our dreams a nightmare

And she slowly dies...
--------
(diler yağız):
All she had was lost.
Her heart. Her love...
And she...

Did he lose just one drop from his eyes?
He was wathing her to die. Hearing her cries, screams...
Of torment...

Words were not enough.
Forgiveness was unfeasible.

And she died. She slowly died.
She still loves him.
She always did...
--------
Serj:
they were never told for having the taste of brute forgiveness. it's all about that -not much, barely close- misunderstanding.

all he had was missing, his heart was broken beneath his love. missing, so close. not much either.

i know that, totally sure about this unconsciousness. you had wanted, passed, needed, bleeded. words're never enough to refer that all. a thin line, a barricade that separates your needs from being awareness of guilt. there's nothing to be forgiven, also to forgive.

love is not a thing that you can hold its responsibilities or get rid of its consequences. it's a mirror. it's a knife. it's a feeling that absorbs pride, and honor, and conscious. it happens, effects. never interests in the tears that dropped from someone else's eyesheds.

so she died, doesn't matter how long she suffered.
she died.
she always wanted.

like all the other optimistics.

she slowly hoped to die. she hoped to die slowly.

thank you.
--------
(diler yağız):
The taste of brute forgiveness...
Could be enough for her.
Maybe she couldn't make herself clear.
Maybe she was just misunderstood.

They were harmful.
This love...
This misunderstanding...
This wish to forgiveness...

So they miss their consciousness.
Cause they had wanted.
Passed...
Needed...
Bleeded...

There was guilt.
What means, there was something to forgive.
To be forgiven...
But this barricade hindered the forgiveness.
Hindered their love...
Their happiness...

They were harmful.
These words...
This barricade...

Yes, it was a mirror.
She stood infront of the mirror.
The reflection was him.
They lost their feelings on the glass of mirror. When the reflection, when he was gone, she was dead.
The last tear could be the last reflected thing, and she could find a way to live.

So she died. No one cared how long she suffered.
She died.
She always wanted.

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